You Know You’re Done Having Babies When…

… you take down the crib and you don’t even shed one single tear.

Sweet PeaI don’t remember the day we took down Sugar Plum’s crib.  It likely wasn’t a big deal to me because I knew (at least I hoped) we’d have more children.

When Bugaboo’s crib came down, Sweet Pea was down the hall in her own crib.

But yesterday, when I asked my husband to take down Sweet Pea’s crib because she hasn’t slept in it in months, preferring the big girl bed instead,  I knew we were done.

Done with cribs and done with having babies.

For the last decade I have been pregnant or breastfeeding for more time than I have not.  I have functioned on less sleep than insomniacs.  I have changed more diapers than I care to recount and while we’re still not out of diapers yet in our house, Sweet Pea spent the better part of yesterday without one.

The truth is, Sweet Pea isn’t a baby any more.  And while all three will forever be my babies, thanks to a little procedure that starts with a V and shall remain nameless, my baby making days are over.

That decade is over.

The crib is gone.

That part of our lives is officially over.

I don’t feel sad about it at all.  Oh sure, some days I have a little baby fever – usually it comes when I’m holding someone else’s baby and the bounce and shhh’s you’ve perfected over the years come back without hesitation and you can’t help but breathe in that new baby smell.

That may never leave – that feeling you get when you hold a new baby tight.

But the crib is gone.

That stage in our lives is gone.

And I didn’t have one single moment of hesitation.

Because I am ready.

I am ready for the next phase of my mommy life.

I thought I might have a tear, a moment or something but I didn’t.  I’m just happy to have more space upstairs so my big kids can play.

I may have blinked and now all of a sudden my kids aren’t babies anymore, but instead of shedding tears for what has gone I am going to look straight ahead and hold on for the ride of whatever comes next.

Wish me luck and if you know anyone who needs a crib let me know!

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  1. Right there with you! Except I still have one in our drop side crib and therefore will eventually have to use it for firewood, along with my now non -regulatory car seats

    • I know! I can;t even believe all of the stuff I’ve accumulated with 3 kids. My DD is 8 now and her “toys” are getting progressively smaller. I can’t wait until the massive Ikea toy storage systems I have can go too 🙂

  2. Oh, good grief! It’s like you’re not even on Pinterest or something 😉 Upcycle the crib! I’m counting down until we get Kingsley the big boy bed so we can convert his crib into a desk. It’s drop down and has no purpose otherwise.

    We’re right there with you with the rest of it, including an appointment next month. I keep expecting the panic and the pleading for one more, but it’s not there. It feels like we’re all here, which I definitely didn’t feel after one or two. I love little babies and kind of miss it, but…. not that much.

    • Jill – of course I’m on pinterest and I actually debated upcycling the crib into a cute hallway bench BUT in our tiny rental each inch of space is at a premium (especially with 3 kids worth of toys hanging around). I don’t have any room at all and would much rather give it to a family in need. Besides… there are tons of other projects I’ve pinned that I’m dying to try 🙂

  3. Yep, we’re all done too. I briefly wanted a third child but my husband said two was it for him. We had a boy, we had a girl, 16 months apart, we had two very difficult pregnancies, and he was right…we were done. I felt pretty anxious about him getting a vasectomy but now that it’s over and done with, I’m relieved. I’m glad gassy tummies and teething are behind us and just really looking forward to what the future has in store.

  4. We had our perfect first, the baby itch hit three years later – three very very long years passed of waiting for baby number two, when I choose to remember Ican easily relive the roller coaster of desperatehope each month and daily cycle tracking and monthly crushed dreams as we battled through secondary infertility. Then our little rooster (well,hen) found her nest. And though I had always seen myself as a Mom of three, it was funny – after my first, I donated or chucked the larger baby items, especially as the years passed, but I held onto all of the clothes she outgrew and certain other baby items I could not part from. Fortunately, clothing wise, as my little chickadees are the same gender, same body type, same month of birth (albeit six years apart), so my clinging onto hope is saving me a fortune in clothes! But as baby number two outgrows her things – bam! Gone. Without a second thought. When you’re done – you’re done! And welcome to the next chapter 🙂

  5. I am in the same boat, I thought I would always want “just one more” but I’m happy to not be pregnant or nursing or at the baby phase anymore. I held my nephew the other day and was surprised at how easy it was to give him right back to his mom :).

  6. It feels so, so very good to *know* when you’re done, doesn’t it?

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